18 hours ago
One year ago, I didnt really know what life is about.
Why are we trying so hard to be successful, when in the end it doesn't really mean anything?
What are the efforts for?
Why am I trying to do something when I can just lay down and do nothing?
Why am I always overworking myself?
What reward is it worth?
Those questions were always in my mind and that made my mood go really downhills, to the point where my grades in school got worse, my behaviour became rude. I was always annoyed towards everyone, even by my own parents who I truly love and couldn't imagine the world without them. I would always spend my time locked in my room, because I wanted to be alone. And always alone. I would not speak to anyone and would start crying out of nowhere over the pain I've felt, because at that time I didnt really know what was exactly wrong with me. I would think a lot, like A LOT. And literally about everything. I was unsatisfied with me.I didnt believe in me. In conclusion, I hated myself.
But then my mindset has started to change since the 22nd of may 2018, when I discovered 7 beautiful angels who tried to spread the message of self love. BTS. Consisting of Kim Seokjin, Min Yoongi, Jung Hoseok, Kim Namjoon, Park Jimin, Kim Taehyung and Jeon Jungkook.
I had school break for a week and decided to watch the bbma's. Then I saw them performing 'Fake love' for the first time and I was speechless. I fell in love with them. The way they performed, I've never seen someone perform like that. Their voices were perfect, the dances on fire and the visual breathtaking.
But the most important thing is, that they helped a lot of people out there who suffered from different kinds of reasons. Including me.
They made me smile again after all the time I couldn't form a smile on my lips. They even made me laugh and to be honest it felt strange. It felt strange that these 7 human beings have succeeded to make me laugh even tho everybody around me was trying so hard. It's strange that I memorized their names and faces in just one day. I fell in love with them on first sight. (Continued in the comments)