1 month ago
This week I had a doctors appointment with OBGYN and my GI doctor. Both did not go the way that I had hoped. I left each appointment feeling discouraged and hopeless. I got into my car and just sat in the parking lot. I started to cry. I closed my eyes tight and cried out, "God, I just don't understand! I can't do this anymore! Please. I need you."
In that moment God reminded me of a verse. 2 Corinthians 12: 7-10 says, "or because these surpassingly great revelations. Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefor I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weakness, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." This sickness was meant for evil, but God has overcome that evil and transformed it into something beautiful. Every pain I feel is a constant reminder of my need for God, my need for his grace, and my need for his strength. What a beautiful reminder!
So now my prayer has changed, "Lord, you are enough. Thank you for being my strength. Thank you for allowing your grace to be magnified through this trial. My prayer is that my sickness will bring me humility in knowing that I will ALWAYS need you, even when my prideful heart tries to face life alone. You are enough, and you always will be."